Hey everyone, this one is just a little stream of conciousness about life right now. It's just where I am.
So, I was really hit last night with a lot of thoughts about my life. I feel like David and I are in a trial that is never ending. I am, most of the time, encouraged and can overcome the heaviness of it. Last night, I just had a hard time. I know we are in God's will to be here in CA, but it just gets tough once in a while. There are only 5 other people who can even understand the intensity of being here and doing what we are doing. (I am immensely grateful for the 5 of you though!) Sometimes, I just want it to be easier, more fun. I know this is totally my flesh, but it gets to the point where I wish we could move somewhere and just join a church that already has leadership in place, where there are tons of people there that are instantly able to be my friends, where we don't have to plow the hard ground because someone else already did it.
I know (because David often reminds me) that the Christians in the book of Acts suffered far more than we will ever suffer in order to grow the kingdom of God. I just cannot seem to understand that or relate to it. I even "know" that people in other countries are facing persecution for believing in Jesus. This, I also cannot really understand. How do you see around your circumstances to the bigger picture? I try to pray about it. I try to ignore it and just go on. I try to think of solutions or work harder to improve. Nothing really seems to help though. I feel like we just have to walk through it. Last night, I got tired of walking. I felt like quitting. I guess I am saying all of this to say--I am in need of your prayers. All I can pray lately that feels authentic is "Breakthrough, God. Breakthrough." Pray that with me, please.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Thursday, July 29, 2010
What I've Been Reading...
I love to read. (I also love to watch movies, but I love to read more.) Specifically, I love to read fiction. I have loved it since I was little. Reading for English classes was never a chore throughout school and even into college. There is just something really beautiful about the creativity and eloquence it takes to write a good work of fiction. Since I fly a lot, I have many hours of uninterrupted reading time. It is my "me" time when I can just enjoy something that makes me happy.
When you read, you can imagine your way into times and places that are outside of your reality. I'm not talking about brain candy like John Grisham (although I do like his books). I mean the real art of storytelling that leaves you feeling like you are somehow part of the plot. Good fiction produces a reaction that changes some small part of who you are.
Recently, I have read three fantastic books: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society (amazing story of a small island off the coast of England and how it survived German occupation during WWII--surprising quite funny), Sarah's Key (a woman's journey of self discovery as she uncovers her family's role in a French Jew's life during WWII), The Swan Thieves (the story of a brilliant but mentally ill painter and his psychiatrist's quest to help him heal). The two WWII novels in a row were a coincidence--very different though and both really well done.
It makes me sad when people don't like to read. So, pick up a book--preferably one of the three above--and read.
I googled Reading Rainbow for a picture to add to this post--come on somebody if you remember Reading Rainbow! Here is the very weird picture that came up. I guess he is SUPER excited about reading?
Nevertheless, props to RR. Way to encourage kids to read through a tv show. Irony.
When you read, you can imagine your way into times and places that are outside of your reality. I'm not talking about brain candy like John Grisham (although I do like his books). I mean the real art of storytelling that leaves you feeling like you are somehow part of the plot. Good fiction produces a reaction that changes some small part of who you are.
Recently, I have read three fantastic books: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society (amazing story of a small island off the coast of England and how it survived German occupation during WWII--surprising quite funny), Sarah's Key (a woman's journey of self discovery as she uncovers her family's role in a French Jew's life during WWII), The Swan Thieves (the story of a brilliant but mentally ill painter and his psychiatrist's quest to help him heal). The two WWII novels in a row were a coincidence--very different though and both really well done.
It makes me sad when people don't like to read. So, pick up a book--preferably one of the three above--and read.
I googled Reading Rainbow for a picture to add to this post--come on somebody if you remember Reading Rainbow! Here is the very weird picture that came up. I guess he is SUPER excited about reading?
Nevertheless, props to RR. Way to encourage kids to read through a tv show. Irony.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Good News--All Hell is Breaking Loose
Remnant Church and its leaders would love your prayers right now. We have good news. All hell is breaking loose against us right now--as a body and individually.
I know this seems like a weird thing to say, but let me explain. When we moved to Cali and started Remnant, there were a lot of things in our hearts and relationships with God that were not healthy. We are finally now at a point where we are all living in passionate pursuit of Jesus and His kingdom. God is moving big time in the church's people. Lives are being internally impacted. Satan is getting scared because we are getting ready to breakthrough in a big way.
So much craziness has happened lately that we should be discouraged. The opposite is happening. Every time some new plot of the devil comes our way, we get encouraged. I am smiling as I write this because I know that Satan would not bother with us if we weren't doing anything for God.
Pray for us to be sustained through trial. Pray that we find favor for all of the issues we are dealing with. Pray that we have strength to overcome and endure. Pray for more salvations. Pray for more baptisms. Pray for more miracles. Pray for more healings. Pray for abundant finances. Pray for the right people to join us.
We so appreciate your support. I can't wait to share all of the ways that God comes through. Very soon!
I know this seems like a weird thing to say, but let me explain. When we moved to Cali and started Remnant, there were a lot of things in our hearts and relationships with God that were not healthy. We are finally now at a point where we are all living in passionate pursuit of Jesus and His kingdom. God is moving big time in the church's people. Lives are being internally impacted. Satan is getting scared because we are getting ready to breakthrough in a big way.
So much craziness has happened lately that we should be discouraged. The opposite is happening. Every time some new plot of the devil comes our way, we get encouraged. I am smiling as I write this because I know that Satan would not bother with us if we weren't doing anything for God.
Pray for us to be sustained through trial. Pray that we find favor for all of the issues we are dealing with. Pray that we have strength to overcome and endure. Pray for more salvations. Pray for more baptisms. Pray for more miracles. Pray for more healings. Pray for abundant finances. Pray for the right people to join us.
We so appreciate your support. I can't wait to share all of the ways that God comes through. Very soon!
Monday, July 19, 2010
My Vacuum Sucks & an Ode to the Swiffer WetJet
I have been having cleaning problems:
1. I avoid mopping at all costs. Sorry that this is gross, but I'm just being real. I can't get into it. There is no particular reason. In my list of stuff to do, mopping just keeps getting pushed lower because the colors on the floor do not show dirt. Out of sight, out of mind. However, seeing the bottom of my socks get dirty from the inside of my house made me feel like a failure of a house keeper. (Sorry for the full disclosure, but I promise that other areas of my house really are clean.)
2. My vacuum sucks....meaning it does not actually do what it should...which is suck. David and I both vacuumed throughout the week and the dog hair on the carpet just would not go away. It was like we were pretending to vacuum but with a real vacuum.
So, I got fed up.
1. I recently saw a friend using a Swiffer WetJet. It looked fun. So, I decided to buy one. It was actually fun in an OCD way. As you mop, you can see all of the dirt collect on the disposable pad on the bottom of the mop. (Although, the pad on the mop looks like someone got the idea from...well, you be the judge.)
After you are done, you just peel the pad off the Swiffer and throw it away. This kind of felt like cleaning the lint out of the dryer trap. :)
2. I decided we are not so poor that we cannot afford a vacuum that actually sucks...how it should. So, I bought a new one. Eureka! Literally, a Eureka. It was glorious. I vacuumed anything that was not moving--carpet, couches, stairs, tile floors. I thought about going to the source of the problem and just vacuuming the dogs directly, but they have a mortal fear of the vacuum. So, they were spared from my vacuuming zeal.
My house is clean.
The end.
1. I avoid mopping at all costs. Sorry that this is gross, but I'm just being real. I can't get into it. There is no particular reason. In my list of stuff to do, mopping just keeps getting pushed lower because the colors on the floor do not show dirt. Out of sight, out of mind. However, seeing the bottom of my socks get dirty from the inside of my house made me feel like a failure of a house keeper. (Sorry for the full disclosure, but I promise that other areas of my house really are clean.)
2. My vacuum sucks....meaning it does not actually do what it should...which is suck. David and I both vacuumed throughout the week and the dog hair on the carpet just would not go away. It was like we were pretending to vacuum but with a real vacuum.
So, I got fed up.
1. I recently saw a friend using a Swiffer WetJet. It looked fun. So, I decided to buy one. It was actually fun in an OCD way. As you mop, you can see all of the dirt collect on the disposable pad on the bottom of the mop. (Although, the pad on the mop looks like someone got the idea from...well, you be the judge.)
After you are done, you just peel the pad off the Swiffer and throw it away. This kind of felt like cleaning the lint out of the dryer trap. :)
2. I decided we are not so poor that we cannot afford a vacuum that actually sucks...how it should. So, I bought a new one. Eureka! Literally, a Eureka. It was glorious. I vacuumed anything that was not moving--carpet, couches, stairs, tile floors. I thought about going to the source of the problem and just vacuuming the dogs directly, but they have a mortal fear of the vacuum. So, they were spared from my vacuuming zeal.
My house is clean.
The end.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Being Passionate
Okay, immediately get your minds out of the gutter.
Now, let's proceed... :)
This is a follow up about one of the topics I mentioned in my last blog. I have a huge desire to be passionate about what I am doing in life. I feel like I go through life day by day working at my job because I cannot figure out anything else I could do to make this much money and not commute into San Francisco. For my lovely readers from other states, the traffic is absolutely horrendous during rush hour, if there is an accident, if there is bad weather like fog...etc.
However being around the amazing Bobbi (http://www.bobbiandmike.com/index2.php), I decided there must be a way to absolutely LOVE what I do every day. I hate the feeling of waking up and inwardly groaning that I have to go to work. I'm not saying I don't want to work. I'm saying I want to be passionate about what I do. Watching Bobbi take pictures, it was very clear that she not only loves what she does but is also really good at it. That's what I want.
I was talking to David about this, and he told me that most people don't love their jobs. To this, I replied that I don't care what most people decide to do with their lives. If people want to schlub through life day by day, that's their choice. Not me. I want to live an extraordinary life. What I'm doing from 8am-5pm right now just isn't cutting it.
My other issue is that I'm not one of those lucky people who immediately know what they were created to do--Musician, dancer, teacher, doctor, whatever. I'm really not sure what God has for me to do. Also, I do not have a special talent. (This is probably the only reason I was not Miss America...nothing to do during the talent competition! Um yeah.) So, what does this average Jane do? No really, I'm asking. What do I do? How do I live a life where I am passionate about what I do every day?
I feel like this was a little dramatic today. So be it. I feel dramatic.
Now, let's proceed... :)
This is a follow up about one of the topics I mentioned in my last blog. I have a huge desire to be passionate about what I am doing in life. I feel like I go through life day by day working at my job because I cannot figure out anything else I could do to make this much money and not commute into San Francisco. For my lovely readers from other states, the traffic is absolutely horrendous during rush hour, if there is an accident, if there is bad weather like fog...etc.
However being around the amazing Bobbi (http://www.bobbiandmike.com/index2.php), I decided there must be a way to absolutely LOVE what I do every day. I hate the feeling of waking up and inwardly groaning that I have to go to work. I'm not saying I don't want to work. I'm saying I want to be passionate about what I do. Watching Bobbi take pictures, it was very clear that she not only loves what she does but is also really good at it. That's what I want.
I was talking to David about this, and he told me that most people don't love their jobs. To this, I replied that I don't care what most people decide to do with their lives. If people want to schlub through life day by day, that's their choice. Not me. I want to live an extraordinary life. What I'm doing from 8am-5pm right now just isn't cutting it.
My other issue is that I'm not one of those lucky people who immediately know what they were created to do--Musician, dancer, teacher, doctor, whatever. I'm really not sure what God has for me to do. Also, I do not have a special talent. (This is probably the only reason I was not Miss America...nothing to do during the talent competition! Um yeah.) So, what does this average Jane do? No really, I'm asking. What do I do? How do I live a life where I am passionate about what I do every day?
I feel like this was a little dramatic today. So be it. I feel dramatic.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Goodness
This past week was filled with so much goodness.
I shared in one of my very best friends' weddings. I am beyond happy for Jess and Bobby. They have a beautiful life ahead together. I told Jess a long time ago when they were in the "falling in love" stage that my life and marriage with David are so good that if anyone settles for less than what we have I feel sorry for them. I think Jess and Bobby have what David and I have. It is not a quality I can name but some indescribable combination of things that I know when I see. Truthfully, I don't see it very often, even in married couples.
Jess was one of the most beautiful brides ever--I know people say that at everyone's wedding, but this is true. All of the bridesmaids would just stare at her because she was that breathtaking.
I got to play dress up with a couple of old friends and a couple of new friends. There is really nothing I like better than doing hair and make up, putting on beautiful clothes and jewelry, and feeling fabulous. Love the hair, love the shoes, love it, love it, love it.
I did not have to work! I was much in need of time away from email and my outlook calendar. (I'm back at work now and already dreaming of my next time off...) Consequently, the wedding photographer inspired me to figure out what I love doing and then start doing it. Hmmm....the tricky part is figuring out what that is. Any suggestions from my wonderful readers/stalkers?
I loved being around a sister and friends who know me so well that I can just be myself without any explaining. That level of friend is hard to come by, and I really do cherish them. I leave you with a final pic that is a keeper. Love these ladies like whoa.
Many more thoughts and insights from last week to come in future bloggage, so stay tuned for more!
I shared in one of my very best friends' weddings. I am beyond happy for Jess and Bobby. They have a beautiful life ahead together. I told Jess a long time ago when they were in the "falling in love" stage that my life and marriage with David are so good that if anyone settles for less than what we have I feel sorry for them. I think Jess and Bobby have what David and I have. It is not a quality I can name but some indescribable combination of things that I know when I see. Truthfully, I don't see it very often, even in married couples.
Jess was one of the most beautiful brides ever--I know people say that at everyone's wedding, but this is true. All of the bridesmaids would just stare at her because she was that breathtaking.
I got to play dress up with a couple of old friends and a couple of new friends. There is really nothing I like better than doing hair and make up, putting on beautiful clothes and jewelry, and feeling fabulous. Love the hair, love the shoes, love it, love it, love it.
I did not have to work! I was much in need of time away from email and my outlook calendar. (I'm back at work now and already dreaming of my next time off...) Consequently, the wedding photographer inspired me to figure out what I love doing and then start doing it. Hmmm....the tricky part is figuring out what that is. Any suggestions from my wonderful readers/stalkers?
I loved being around a sister and friends who know me so well that I can just be myself without any explaining. That level of friend is hard to come by, and I really do cherish them. I leave you with a final pic that is a keeper. Love these ladies like whoa.
Many more thoughts and insights from last week to come in future bloggage, so stay tuned for more!
Friday, July 2, 2010
WORD for your Friday
I LOVE my new Bible. I think I say that quite often. It is the Life Application Study Bible in the NASB version. I HIGHLY recommend it. I am more excited to read the Word than I have been in a few years. It has many amazing features including footnotes about historical context, footnotes about life application of verses, profiles of different people from each book, an overview of each book, and many more really useful tools. Warning: It is also a fatty version of the Bible.
It is literally like I'm reading the Bible for the first time again. Amazing. It is so good that my Bible scholar of a husband keeps trying to steal it from me. I have held firm though insisting he will have to get his own!
So, I thought I would share a couple of thoughts from my recent reading:
1. John 20:1 "Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the entrance."
We read elsewhere that Jesus basically was no longer governed by physical law when he suddenly appeared in a room where the disciples were hanging out. Why then, did he roll away the stone to the tomb? He did not need to do that to get out of the tomb. Jesus rolled away the stone, so the disciples could get into the tomb and see that He was risen. A lot of times, God does things in our lives a certain way, so WE can see His actions and recognize what He has done.
2. John 20:13-16 'They asked her, "Woman, why are you crying?" "They have taken my Lord away," she said, "and I don't know where they have put him." At this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize that it was Jesus. "Woman," he said, "why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?" Thinking he was the gardener, she said, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him." Jesus said to her, "Mary." She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, "Rabboni!" (which means Teacher).'
Mary did not expect to see Jesus. It was beyond her reasoning that He would be there and be alive. She was looking at her grief and not her God. How many times are we blinded to recognizing Jesus because we don't expect to see Him in our situation?
Shabaaam.
It is literally like I'm reading the Bible for the first time again. Amazing. It is so good that my Bible scholar of a husband keeps trying to steal it from me. I have held firm though insisting he will have to get his own!
So, I thought I would share a couple of thoughts from my recent reading:
1. John 20:1 "Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the entrance."
We read elsewhere that Jesus basically was no longer governed by physical law when he suddenly appeared in a room where the disciples were hanging out. Why then, did he roll away the stone to the tomb? He did not need to do that to get out of the tomb. Jesus rolled away the stone, so the disciples could get into the tomb and see that He was risen. A lot of times, God does things in our lives a certain way, so WE can see His actions and recognize what He has done.
2. John 20:13-16 'They asked her, "Woman, why are you crying?" "They have taken my Lord away," she said, "and I don't know where they have put him." At this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize that it was Jesus. "Woman," he said, "why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?" Thinking he was the gardener, she said, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him." Jesus said to her, "Mary." She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, "Rabboni!" (which means Teacher).'
Mary did not expect to see Jesus. It was beyond her reasoning that He would be there and be alive. She was looking at her grief and not her God. How many times are we blinded to recognizing Jesus because we don't expect to see Him in our situation?
Shabaaam.
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